Since Mohen and I are always having, well not we – more like me sometimes, making such a big fuss out of small things; we sat and talk the night after that little argument we had.
Of course as always, I said things that I don’t mean and said them just to hurt him just because to make him feel bad for making me feel that way. Most of the times I made myself felt that way and putting the blame on him. More than once I played the gender card where I am the sensitive one and need attention. I very well know Mohen and I know that he needs as much attention as I do from him.
I know this. But I do it on purpose most of the times. Not to create arguments or whatever, but simply for the fact that I want him to feel just as bad. I don’t know why I need to do that. It isn’t fair most of the times because as I said, I usually brought those things upon myself.
All the times (so far and I hope this will always be so) we talked it out. If not the same day, the day after. Sometimes we sit and talk about it several days after. I think the longest that we have gone without talking to each other much (note that I said much) was 3 days. I don’t think it was fine because Mohen and I are as thick as thieves and it was really awkward when we were avoiding each other in the hallway just so that we won’t rub shoulders when usually he will grab my waist or I will place my hand on his stomach as we pass each other.
I know that every couple will have something that either always argue about or argue all the time about different things. On an average, I would say that Mohen and I have a great relationship. Despite so many things that we talk heatedly about, despite me being childish sometimes (which I belatedly realized after our Talk), we know that we love each other very much. And we know that either of us would go to the ends of the world for each other if the need ever rise.
I believe that familiarity breeds contempt and sometimes that does happen between me and Mohen. But I think it only makes the relationship much more perfect because we live in each other’s flaw and try to compensate with so many other things that are beautiful about us, about each other.
I hate it that I need to argue just to gain perspective. I wonder how Mohen can live with me because sometimes I think even I can’t live with me.