It’s 5am, I think.
I always hear them say that I usually wake up around 5am so this must be it. It’s dark except for this light glow of light coming from somewhere on my left and it’s cold. I have my blankie around my legs that Amu placed so that I am warm enough at night to stop me from waking up every hour because that is what I do if it’s too cold or too hot.
Now my bum is wet.
I have been making loud sound with my mouth to call for Amu but I didn’t see her face looking at me at the crib yet. Usually by a few minutes I called out she would be there. But not tonight. I wonder where she is. I tossed and turned but it only made me feel worse since my diaper rubs against my bum more. I called out to Amu one more time.
Then I saw her. She lazily rubs her eyes and brushed her long hair away from her face. She squinted at me in the dark and smiled. I smiled and kicked my legs to be picked up. Amu sniffed my diaper and tsk-tsk. I don’t know why she did that but whenever she did that, I know she was going to pick me up real soon.
Amu disappeared for a moment and I heard sounds as though she was doing something. When she passed by my crib, I saw she was carrying the white bottles of lotion and talc in one arm and had a diaper sandwiched between her ear and shoulder as her other hand held the phone. I think she is talking to Dada because I have not sensed Dada in the room since after the evening Amu bathed me.
She placed me on her bed and I rolled to my left happily, forgetting about my soaked diaper. I love being on her bed because it’s so much bigger than my crib and I can roll around as though there is no end to the bed. Amu said something I couldn’t understand and she dragged me back by her side. When she reached out to remove my pajamas pants and I moved to the other side of the bed, rolling away from her again.
Amu spoke again and this time she sounded different. I kept still and let her take off my pants and my soiled diaper. I took the rubber blue ring she gave me, biting the soft surface while kicking my legs in the air. She wiped my bum with one of those cold wipes that I don’t like and spread nappy cream all over my bum and thighs. I love the smell of the talc when Amu sprinkled them all over my bum and diaper because it made me feel dry and nice.
She picked me up and started kissing my cheek. I turned the other side because her hair was getting into my face but then her lips are on me again, this time from the other side that I had turned away. I wriggled in her arms and Amu snuggled my neck. It made me laugh that I banged the rubber ring on her head. She laughed but took the thing away from my hand. I objected and started to cry but she ignored me as she kept the talc and lotion bottles away.
After a while, I was getting tired of rolling on her bed so I called out to her to pick me up. Amu tucked me in my crib again with the blankie up to my chin. She feed me with the milk in my bottle and watched me to sleep. I tried to keep my eyes open because I don’t want to see her go away but I am so sleepy and Amu is singing my favorite bedtime song and I can’t help but to close my eyes.
It was cold and dark again. My bum is no longer wet.
I can’t see Amu anymore but I can smell her so I know she’s near. I’m not afraid to sleep alone because Amu said big boys will sleep in their own bed. But I also know when I open my eyes again, Amu will be there.
<i>Eros calls me Amu. I don’t know where he learns it from but whenever he sees my face, he will call out Amu…</i>